The Snake

Recounting an event from the 21st of October.
I was somewhat taken aback. After a five hour journey, we had finally arrived at the orphanage. Before leaving, it said that we would be staying at a host family and once at the orphanage it said that there is none. Moreover, we were told that most of the children were HIV+ which wasn't mentioned before earlier. We were sitting there, waiting for the main organizer (an incredibly inspiring woman that I later got to know as Sushila) to arrive. Our Hindi was (unfortunately, it still is) very poor and it was hard for us to communicate. So for most of the time, we just passively sat in embarrassed silence. The many children around us were shy and curious and smiled a lot at us. After a while, we started to talk and play with them. Suddenly, there was screaming and all children excitedly run to the balcony. The older children were holding up some of the little ones so that they would be able to see across the fence.

Rankling and slowing moving in the dust, there was a fat black snake. Some of the older kids were poking it and teasing it. It slowly moved towards the orphanage. It felt like a nightmare and I was suddenly overcome by a strong feeling of nausea

Contrasting this,with a dream, I've just had this night:

Another volunteer from New Zealand and me are staying at some festival. There's a cheerful atmosphere and excitement is in the air. One of the rituals seems to be to hit with a big wooden stick a snake, which said to incorporate evil spirits. Separating the snake head from its body, dispels the bad spirit. The frantic circling around the snake smashing its skull is somehow reminiscent of a dance and the atmosphere is joyful and mystical. 

Then the dream's location shifts to my home in Switzerland and my friends are preparing a dish in the kitchen. I come in, caring the dead snake,  feeling disgust but at the same time excitement. I dump it in the sink. When done with their dish, my friends make the final preparations above the sink and I an trying to tell them that the snake is just below them, but I'm shaken so hard by laughter that I have trouble explaining myself.

My first blog

I still can't quite believe that I've just created a blog. I was always certain that I would never do so, leaving aside the fact that I'm a complete technophobe and find it hard figuring out how all that stuff works :P
However, I've somehow reached this point where I feel the need to get a wider range of opinions. Sometimes, I feel so lonely with all these questions and worries in my head and I wish there's somebody out there who can understand me.- How pathetic that sounds!!!
Ok, to my excuse, it's already past 1 am here in India and I should get up tomorrow morning to volunteer in the orphanage with HIV+ children, where I have been working since mid-December.
Too many thoughts keep me from falling asleep and I just wrote that random text trying to organize my thoughts. It's really just experimental as it's one of the first poems I've ever written- apart from the ones my English forced me to write- and therefore probably quite crappy...

Here it goes:

Thoughts on morality

is it moral to live

is it moral to live day to day live

thinking about nothing but oneself

my hurries and worries

my diet coke, hair stroke and funny joke

my health and wealth

my sleep and wake at the beep

you may say, i am moral.

i think about others, care about others, donate to others

however, much you may have given;

is it truly moral to enjoy imported coffee,

with children in the street fighting for a toffee

how can your conscience be clear

seeing people full of death's fear

children with  protruding bones

unable to withhold their moans

you see them searching for food in the dirt

your belly still full of an exquisite dessert

who decides that this should be justice

who entitles you to call yourself moral

what if the places were reversed

would you forgive yourself if you were that begging child..

would you call the person moral

who's rejecting your begging hand

thinking of a beach holiday planned

would you call the person moral

whose sipping on a coke 

knowing you are broke

the one enjoying the coffee

while you are craving a toffee

would you stop begging for more

after you were given usual times four

the comfy arm chair within range,

you are too scared to change

no need to worry-

for despite your inner quarrel,

people call you moral


As mentioned earlier, I have already been in India, more accurately, Jaipur (in the state of Rajasthan) for over a month and as I'm only now starting to blog, there's quite a few experiences which I will have to recount. Sooooo much has already happened and I regret not having starting this blog earlier! I had so many ups and downs. To say it in a nutshell, initially, I was in simple awe and the culture-shock was so overwhelming that I did not even have time to think about anything. Everything was strange and exciting and I enjoyed my first week in New Delhi very much. After two weeks or so, I started to miss certain ''simple'' comforts from back home. Another week passed and I came down with a viral fever of over 39.7 degrees. I missed private space as I stayed with three other volunteers and all the girls from the orphanage in one room having four beds. All I wanted, at this point, was to board the next flight back home, which is Switzerland. However, after getting better, I felt like new born and eventually, I fell in love with India...